Craziness

Today, when I was telling a coworker about my upcoming wedding, she said I was so calm considering its immediate proximity. I took it as a compliment, but didn't really believe her. The wedding, I feel, has consumed me. It has taken me whole, swirled me up in the air. I feel like a piece of melted taffy, bending to the whims and desires of this friendly beast. But it's ok, I think, because I look calm on the outside! And until now, I have been (relatively) crazy-free, at least in respect to the wedding. Now, I dream wedding, I eat wedding for breakfast, I think wedding even when I am trying to do pleasure reading, I talk wedding to friends, family, strangers, storekeepers, colleagues...anyone who will lend half an ear. I write wedding in my blog. It has usurped me. Days go by, inching up to the big day. I don't have a calendar where you rip a page off every day, but that's how I feel. I haven't quite calculated how many days it is to W-day, but each morning I wake up and think, "I am one day closer."